Too much poop not enough hairspray

Ok so it’s been a really awful day. I don’t seem to be able to get one thing done. The babies know that I am winging it. I feel like a new mom. I’m over worked, under paid and so tired that I have no idea where or what I am doing. I need a bath my hair, needs washing, I smell like throw up and I have a strange rash on my bum. Is diaper rash contagious? I don’t remember it being this bad when my kids were little. I can’t get from the front door to the bedroom without stepping over a pile and DS (darling sons) girlfriend is a useful as tits on plywood. I miss my world. I miss the corporate world and being able to go a whole day without smelling poop or feeling like I can’t do anything.

It wasn’t that long ago that I had 6 attorneys that jumped to my every word. Now I have 2 grand babies’ that look at me like I lost my mind. Not long ago I handled millions of dollars of properties and people quivered when I got upset. Now they laugh at me. They scream and I jump. I miss getting up early and actually leaving my house. Damn I even miss girdles, pantyhose and hair spray.


Hair spray!!! Hair spray, I miss that smell. The smell that says I’m important. The smell of hair spray and perfume mixed. The smell that says I’m a grown up with makeup and everything. Hair spray is the foundation of every woman’s wardrobe. The one thing I was never able to do without. Now I just miss the smell more than anything the one thing that is solely mine.

So for now just sign me……….too much poop not enough hairspray