The laundry conspiracy theory…………..

Today I decided to finally take all those baskets of clothes in our bedroom and put them away. Too bad there’s not a laundry fairy that could visit in the middle of the night, and poof…… gone. I know the only fairy in this house is me and my damn wings are clipped. What happens in the middle of the night? Does the laundry come to life and mate? It seems like over night piles of laundry double. I know with the addition of the babies in the house there’s gonna be more laundry. I know I know but come on now. Three loads of clothes a week to sixteen. My god something funny’s going on. If the clothes aren’t mating then these boys are getting up and rolling around in dirt. I tell you it’s a conspiracy and I’m gonna get to the bottom of it.

DGS, Eli seems to go through two or three pairs of drawers every day. I can understand DGS, Joey having a lot of laundry. He requires a lot more attention. Please explain it to me. How the heck do three loads turn into sixteen? Joey drools all over and is constantly having to been changed. Not to mention that every two hours he’s getting Pediasure all over everything.

Eli, on the other hand, has no reason for the amount of laundry he seems to amass. He’s a boy for goodness sake. Boys don’t play dress up. They don’t agonize over what to wear, or suddenly decided they look fat in there clothes. Ok........ maybe that’s me. He’s four for goodness sake. At four I should be the one in control not him. Me not a four year old. I know it’s been a while since I had babies, but things haven’t changed that much or have they? Maybe it’s that I’m so much older and don’t have as much energy. Na, that can’t be it. I’m not old………..yeah right.

Ok maybe it’s not there fault, maybe they’re forced to change a million times a day. Maybe the same alien’s that keep trashing my house force them to conspire against me to insure that I’m chained to the washer and dryer. Those same aliens coerce Elijah to lick my storm door glass door from top to bottom and make me wash it again and again and again. Yeah that’s it. It’s a conspiracy to keep me down and in servitude to the great powers that be. (You know Elijah and Josiah.) They’re conspiring to make sure that I have no time, my hair falls out, and I get fat, have wrinkles, and of course loose my mind. Yes I have a mind, or did till the last couple weeks. It’s turned to mush but I have a mind. Don't you see it's a conspiracy? An out right conspiracy pure and simple.

So next time you’re invaded by the laundry monster, remember you too might have conspirators hiding in the closet…………….

Power to the Mama’s and Nana’s too……………………

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Too true...........